Still Counting

Some of you guys have asked if we're still counting when we put Tyler in "time-out." We are.

I do think it is working. Sometimes Tyler even listens the first time I tell him "no."

He has only touched my glasses once since last week when I put him in time-out three times for the serious offense of yanking my glasses off my face.

He had gotten into the habit of throwing things down the stairs every time I was putting detergent in the washing machine or flushing a dirty diaper. At first, my philosophy was, "At least he's not throwing it in the toilet as I'm flushing the dirty diaper." But when I was carrying 15 books and 3 laundry baskets back up the stairs at the end of the day (or worse, letting them stack up at the bottom of the stairs for days at a time), I realized what a bad habit it was.

Now we're down to about one book a day and the occasional laundry basket. Usually I hear the first book go down the stairs and I make Tyler sit for a count of 20. I can usually trust him for about 2 minutes while I finish whatever I'm doing.

We've seriously cut down on the throwing of toys. I wish I'd counted how many times I counted the day I made that a priority! Tyler loved to hoist heavy toys over the banister that separates the kitchen from the living room and over the gate that fences off the fireplace. He just likes to hear them crash on the other side. He still throws the occasional toy over, but it isn't constant. And a time-out or two convinces him to find something else to do.

He really tested me on the kitchen boundaries a couple of days ago, though. Before time-outs, I'd say, "The milk stays in the kitchen" as he'd walk toward the living room or the hall. He wouldn't even slow down. I'd grab the straw cup and use it to lead him back to the kitchen saying firmly, over and over, "The milk stays in the kitchen." He would turn and walk back out of the kitchen.

After a few time-outs, he started walking backward toward the "boundary" of the kitchen. I'd remind him "The milk stays in the kitchen." If he kept walking backward, I'd stand up and he'd run back into the kitchen. If I didn't offer the reminder fast enough, he'd turn and run as soon as he hit the boundary as if he were home free. I'd count through a time-out. We must have gone through this process for 20 minutes one afternoon.

Since then, I do still catch him in another room with his milk. I really think he might just forget. He is still a baby. But if I see him walking out of the kitchen and remind him, he usually comes right back. And a few times, he's set his milk on the floor and then walked out of the kitchen!

Now, for those of you who have kids that are about Tyler's age, let me assure you that he still throws his milk. He lays the cup on the side and rolls it around the kitchen. I find it on its side, leaking all over the floor. He often throws it down from the high chair.

And that reminds me, the high chair makes the time-out thing difficult. He's already sitting! But I hold his hands together and count so that he knows he's in trouble. Tonight, he wouldn't stop grabbing the tablecloth at the restaurant. We counted a few times and then Brian and I were able to eat our meal in relative peace while Tyler snacked on chips, with just a few reminders not to touch the tablecloth. At least the counting worked well enough that all the food stayed on the table. That hasn't always been the case when Tyler gets too close to a tablecloth!